Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
