I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
