even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
don't judge my taste in strippers
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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