If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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