Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I touched a dick in church today
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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