Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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