Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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