you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
