I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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