Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
