We're facebook friends in real life
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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