my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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