just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
