I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
