in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
