hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
