If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
