oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
