Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
