I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
