Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
