you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize