Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
