How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
