He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize