So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
