I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
