If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
