actually, I'm a sock model
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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