the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
He had one of those small greek statue penises
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize