You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
