I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
