did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Found your dick twin last night
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
