i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
