I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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