I don't think brook has ever known best
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Blood and glitter go together right?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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