Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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