started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
