I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
