Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
