So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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