is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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