FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
