Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
