dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
