He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
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