great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
