Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize