The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
id be glad to
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
i believe in u and ur pee
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
