did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
The adults are the big ones right?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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