Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Im part way to drunk.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
